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    我不知是该感谢你还是憎恨你

      再次登陸了这个空间,我离开這裏到底有多久?記憶的長河在哗哗作響。這裏有著我太多太多的記憶,也殘留著我几篇的文字。说起来我很酸涩,酸涩是因为我的确不知道你过得好不好。是不是在你的记忆里偶尔还会闪过一个我。
         一個人的一生到底會愛几個人我真的不了解,但是我知道,我爱过你,深深的爱过你。而且只有爱过你。我都不曾想过,当一个人爱过一个人后,是不是还会如此淡然的接纳另外的人。即使接纳也不会走到心底了吧。是的,我是在憎恨你,憎恨你怎会如此无情夺走我的爱,今生唯一的爱。我会学着忘记你,即使在风起云涌的日子也会学着忘记。即使在漫天飘雪的日子也会学着忘记。在爱情里,爱的最深的那个始终是弱者,我要做一个强者。永远无惧的强者。
         是我把你丢掉的,我要把我们的爱打包丢掉。你說,你不会离开那个人。那么我又算做什么?我也非常渴望被关怀,被宠爱,渴望你全心全意的爱。所以为了救赎我自己,我必需丢了你,你可曾知道我把自己也给丢了。我不再甜美微笑,不再轻松快乐。我变得郁郁寡欢,我开始成熟了稳重了。渐渐的我也了解,世间可信度实在太少了,即使他人真心绝对,也会觉得半信半疑。虽然嘴上說十分相信,但是内心卻疑虑多多。这些都是你給的,我不知是该感谢你。还是来憎恨你。
          你可曾知晓,直到今天我不会恨你,只会爱你。这个你可曾知道。趁着月色,讓我再回忆我们的过去,回忆从前的那个你。
         写完今天的文字,將淡淡的忧伤打開,又將其輕輕關閉。亲爱的,我來過了,輕輕的又離開。縱是夜寒風凜冽,心卻是暖了。要快樂。并祝你永远都要快樂。
     

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